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Revive sexual desire
For couples who want to rediscover desire, spontaneity and the pleasure of being together, with a structured program designed by François Renaud, sexologist and psychotherapist.
Discover the sex life you actually want, by reviving sexual desire in your relationship
A fulfilling sex life does not happen on its own. It has to be recreated throughout your relationship.
There are legitimate obstacles to sexual desire that have to be addressed if you hope to get back the sex life you and your partner want.
The program in video
This program is for you if
- You (or your partner) feel guilty about the lack of sexual desire
- You worry about your partner's sexual satisfaction
- You want sex to be easy and a relaxing part of your relationship
- You argue and can no longer see eye to eye about sex
- You have had little or no sex for a long time
- You have little or no conflict, but sexual intimacy just isn't happening
- You want to get out of the feeling of obligation
- You want to rediscover pleasure and the desire to be together
Here is the truth
A fun, easy sex life doesn’t just create pleasure — it also:
- Deepens the intimacy between you and your partner, creating more connection!
- Helps you get rid of any sense of obligation, or of sex being seen as a chore!
- Prevents BREAKUPS in your relationship when one of you wants it less than the other!
- Creates an intimacy where you cannot fail! There is flexibility in how you can be intimate.
- And… it does all of this for you without anyone having to do things they don’t want to do!
The #1 mistake couples keep making
When someone struggles with low desire, they think there is something wrong with them.
They feel guilty that their partner’s needs aren’t being met. They feel broken.
It feels like everything rests on them. As if they were the problem. And it’s up to them to fix it.
If that’s you, you already know how heavy it is to carry. The guilt. The shame. The hopelessness. The confusion. And even the resentment that can come from feeling like you’re the problem.
And you already know that feeling bad about yourself does NOT help you want to make love.
It doesn’t help either that the higher-desire partner often thinks something is wrong with them too! That adds to the pressure and to the feelings of disappointment and hopelessness.
Or worse still! Mistake #2…
They’ll simply do it for their partner. They’ll show up and just try to have sex, to tick that box. They think: “I care about them. I can do this for them.” (It starts with good intentions.)
But eventually, they’ll start avoiding it. They dread Sunday morning if that’s when it’s expected. They stop looking forward to date night because they know their partner is hoping for sex. It’s like looking forward to eating a dessert that has gone bad and wishing it tasted wonderful!
There will come a point where they can no longer stand the idea of eating the spoiled dessert!
And it doesn’t actually make the other person happy! They want a partner who desires sex with them.
The #3 mistake couples keep making
Working only on communication DOES NOT WORK! Some couples recognise that their sexual desire (or lack of it) is the cause of their unsatisfying sex life, so they decide they simply need to learn better communication skills. MISTAKE.
In reality, getting better at discussing the problem doesn’t make it go away! While those skills matter, they do nothing to create sexual desire in someone!
Don’t you think learning a few communication tools, like “I statements”, sounds a little too good to be true? Even therapists make this mistake.
In fact, as long as you don’t CONFRONT the desire difference head-on, the problem will never disappear.
And after 13 years of guiding clients in my sex therapy practice and training health professionals on the subject, it is as clear and simple as this:
Actually wanting to have sex is the only way to create a fulfilling sex life.
Your sex life needs desire and pleasure for BOTH partners. You and your partner DESERVE a strong intimate connection and sexual satisfaction!
The odds that you are both unsatisfied are high. Pity sex or duty sex is no fun for anyone. Making love with someone who isn’t interested is a mediocre experience.
The fear of the higher-desire partner is that if they don’t accept bad sex, they’ll get no sex at all.
But when you keep seeing sex as a chore (or worse, something to avoid), you and your partner never get to SHARE sex as a mutual, intimate moment in your relationship! Instead, it weakens intimacy and closeness. It casts a dark shadow over every other area that works so well. It can even crack the foundations of your love!
What happens when time passes and sex simply becomes stressful or boring? Or when you go weeks, months, even years without sex that creates real connection?
But when you LEARN and MASTER the skills to spark desire, BOTH of you can enjoy a sex life that feels easy and light! You can focus on the rest of your life, because you no longer have to waste your energy on worry, guilt, frustration, disappointment and fear.
You're struggling with a desire gap
…but you’re afraid to talk about it or tackle the problem because you don’t think there’s anything to be done about it. You’re putting up with it for now. You tell yourself it’s not THAT bad…
Well, you might be right!
MOST struggling couples live like this for years, looking fine (at least from the outside). But do you really want to wait until it gets THAT bad? Do you want to wait until it might be too late?
Of course not! And no problem magically disappears while we pretend it isn’t there, right?
It’s so easy to convince yourself everything is fine. To say: “We’ll deal with that when the kids are a bit older.” Or: “Once I’m through this stressful project at work, I’ll have more energy for sex.” Or: “I don’t want to put pressure on my partner or make them uncomfortable.”
Are you as close and connected with your partner as you could be? What’s going on beneath the surface of your relationship? How long can your partner keep going without an intimate, enjoyable relationship with you?
So, which matters more?
… that you do EVERYTHING you can to make your relationship truly solid, secure and connected…
OR that you stay in your comfort zone and keep putting it off, hoping it will change, or pretending everything is fine?
You want MORE happiness, not less. Right?
The reality is that the strength of your sex life has a direct impact on how solid your relationship is! The impact of your desire difference is like a barely visible crack in a beautiful vase!
Now that you realise how vital your intimate connection is to your relationship, you might start to find the task of actually improving that connection slightly intimidating and big…
Are you (or your partner) currently suffering from "I could live my whole life without sex" syndrome?
If you’re like most people who have read this far, you’re starting to see how important a fulfilling sex life is and what it will do for the strength and connection of your relationship… but you probably lie awake before bed wondering:
“I’m still at the same place — do I just need to have sex so my partner is happy?!”
“Is our whole sex life just duty sex?”
“Is this going to be stressful for the rest of our lives? Do I really have to think about it all the time?!”
It can be so intimidating and discouraging that you avoid it, looking for other ways to stay busy and distracted in your life. And I get it.
But here’s a little “insider secret” for you:
Getting the relationship you want doesn't mean either of you has to do things you don't want to do… it means you have to STOP doing them!
You see, every time someone takes part in sex they don’t really want, they reinforce the idea of sex as a chore. As an obligation. And that will kill their desire. And if they keep going long enough, they’ll reach a point where they simply can’t do it any more. Resentment will start to build.
It's a bit of a double-edged sword: what is the lower-desire person supposed to do if they don't want sex but aren't supposed to do things they don't want to do?
Answer: FIND. WHAT. THEY. WANT. AND. HAVE. GOOD. SEX.
What both people enjoy is essential. You can remove (or adapt to) all the obstacles that harm your desire, and then you can build a sex life that is satisfying for the lower-desire partner as much as for the higher-desire one.
So what if you had a step-by-step method to find those obstacles? What if you had a process to discover what would make sex exciting for both of you?
Imagine if you had a way to share sex with your partner where you could never fail… EVEN if one of you hasn’t felt desire in a long time!
No more guilt! No more pressure! No more disappointment! No more duty sex! No more needing to avoid it!
"It's normal to go through a sexual slump in a relationship. It's even desirable!"
, François Renaud, sexologist and psychotherapist
My clients are always surprised when I say this. How can a loss of sexual desire, and all the conflict that comes with it, be DESIRABLE?!
Because it forces the couple to step back and acknowledge the gaps in their sex life and in their relationship. Being in a couple pushes us to recognise our limits as partners and our insecurities around sex.
The sexual slump is simply the necessary passage to reach a more satisfying, more intimate relationship, with a better version of yourself who is more mature relationally and sexually.
You can transform your sex life. Just imagine for a moment…
… that you look forward to going to bed with excitement (instead of that awkward tension and the open question of "not tonight again")…
… you and your partner exchange a genuine, knowing smile when an intimate scene comes on television (instead of that awkwardness because of the elephant in the room)…
… the two of you can be playful and cheeky in the kitchen (without that fear that it might lead to more)…
… You could have the closeness and connection that come from a fulfilling sex life starting NOW!
Wouldn’t that be nice? Well, you no longer need to “imagine” it. Because… it’s POSSIBLE!
What if you no longer had to pretend?
Imagine a playful intimacy, with no pressure and no obligation. It’s possible, and it starts now.
François Renaud, M.A.
Sexologist and psychotherapist
The program in three sections
Understanding sexual desire
- How sexual desire evolves in a couple
- Cycles of growth and stagnation
- The different types of sexual desire
- Learning to recognise what feeds desire
- Understanding sex in a long-term relationship
What kills sexual desire
- Poorly handled conflict
- Combative alliance
- Collusive alliance
- Lack of differentiation between partners
- Emotional fusion
- Avoidance of intimacy
- Duty sex
- Lack of sexual variety
- Repetitive or restrictive sexual scripts
- Performance and anxiety
- Absence of sexual presence
- Routine and autopilot
What sparks sexual desire
- Focusing on pleasure and sexual presence
- Deeper intimacy
- Emotional balance for a calmer sex life
- The ability to speak up and let yourself be seen
- Sexual variety and creativity
- Mind-mapping desire
What you walk away with
More connection
Deepens the emotional intimacy between you and your partner.
Less obligation
Helps you get rid of the sense of duty, of performance and of routine.
Preventing a breakup
Prevents breakups linked to desire gaps and unresolved conflict.
A new paradigm
Creates a new, lasting way of approaching sex within your relationship.
What to expect from this program:
Ready to bring desire back into your relationship?
Your transformation
What this program changes for you
01
Rediscover closeness
02
Desire that comes from you
03
A sex life that lasts
That's great, but…
SUMMARY
A quick summary of the program
- Several hours of content, broken down into short videos on the concepts of desire
- Questionnaires to reflect on your own and/or with your partner
- A new understanding of your relationship dynamic
- Concrete tools to increase your intimacy and your sexual connection
- Ways to cultivate sexual presence and step out of performance
- Mind-mapping and how it helps your sex life day to day
- Activities and reflections to do alone or as a couple
- A sex life that is yours and that is satisfying
Frequently asked questions
How long do I have to complete the program?
Do I have to follow the program with my partner?
Does this program replace couples therapy?
What if I'm already in therapy?
Shouldn't sex be natural? Why follow a program?
Sex… is natural. I shouldn't need a program for it to work.
François Renaud, M.A.
Sexologist and psychotherapist, clinical supervisor
Member of OPSQ, ASQ, OPQ
I have been in private practice since 2011 and I appear regularly in the media, on radio and television. My humorous style makes it easier to lighten subjects around sexuality that are often taboo and difficult to raise. My approach tackles the underlying issues in relationships, and I do not shy away from talking about sexuality in detail. That makes it possible to integrate, at a deep level, the concepts and the changes your relationship and your sexual life as a couple need. Using the mind-mapping concept helps redefine the couple dynamics that kill love and your satisfaction as a couple. Mind-mapping also deepens your intimacy and the depth of your relationship and your sex life.
My approach puts my clients’ integrity first and brings out the best in them. I help put an end to the behaviours that create conflict in couples’ sexuality. I do not take four roads to get straight to the point, which can be confronting and therefore makes it possible to get to the heart of the issues in your relationship.
Get the Revive Sexual Desire program
Regular price: $730
Value of $1200
$350
When paying for the program in full
or 3 payments of $159
Ready to revive your desire?
The program is available immediately after your order. An individual or couple consultation can complement the program if you would like personalised support.
Book an appointment
Guarantee
Although this program is based on concepts and theoretical approaches validated by research in sexology and psychotherapy, and on years of experience, university training and continuing education as a sexologist and psychotherapist, it is impossible for me to guarantee any result or change from following this program. That would go against the code of ethics of sexologists who are members of the Quebec professional order of sexologists.
The changes you may experience through this program depend largely on the effort and involvement you put into it. Your particular situation may require deeper help through personalised follow-up. This program is aimed at people who wish to be self-directed in their personal and relationship journey and/or who want to begin an independent process.
Terms and conditions
The information on this website and the resources available for download are for educational and informational purposes only.
The information cannot be considered professional medical or mental health advice. Even though the program is offered by a sexologist and psychotherapist and covers health-related topics, the information cannot replace the advice of a professional who knows the facts and circumstances of your individual situation.
We encourage you, where needed, to consult a mental health professional as named in the program, depending on your situation.
We cannot be held responsible for any harm you may suffer as a result of not consulting a health professional who knows your particular case.
Use of this program cannot in any way be considered a professional therapist-client therapeutic relationship as understood in personalised follow-up with a sexologist and psychotherapist.
Purchasing this program is not an agreement to become a client of François Renaud as understood in a psychotherapy service. You accept and acknowledge that in order to be accepted as a psychotherapy client in personalised follow-up — which is different from being a client who purchases the program — a personalised follow-up must first be determined and agreed together following an in-person assessment of your specific circumstances. That assessment is not required to purchase this program or take part in it.