When your sex life is manage by astral objects!

Ah, gender stereotypes and sexual desire! As a sexologist, this is my daily bread. I spend my days navigating between “Men are from Mars” and “Women are from Venus.” And honestly, if Mars and Venus could talk, they would laugh at our earthly quarrels.

Let’s start with the classic stereotype: “Men always think about sex.” You know, the cliché that every time a man looks out the window, he’s not admiring the view but imagining scenarios worthy of an adult film. Really? I assure you, dear readers, men are capable of thinking about other things like football, hamburgers, or why socks mysteriously disappear in the washing machine.

And what about women? Oh, the famous belief that “Women never think about sex; they prefer a good cup of tea and an intimate conversation.” Let me tell you, in my sexology practice, I’ve heard stories of female fantasies that would make E. L. James herself blush. Women are not asexual angels who are content with reading romance novels under a blanket. They have desires and urges just as powerful as men, even if they sometimes express them differently.

Then there’s the stereotype that men are “predators” always on the hunt for conquests, while women are the “guardians of the temple,” defending their virtue like a knight protects his castle. Seriously? Have you ever tried to refuse a chocolate cake? Well, it’s a bit the same for sexual desire. Both men and women can be knights on a quest or guardians, depending on the situation and the person.

The classic: I see you and get hard. We talk I get lubricated

Another classic: “Men are visual, women are emotional.” Translation: a man will be excited by a nice pair of legs, while a woman needs an emotional connection to feel desire. So yes, maybe Brad Pitt in his underwear will have more effect on some women than reading a poem by Baudelaire, but believe me, men also need a certain dose of emotion for their desire to ignite. After all, who hasn’t been attracted to someone with whom they share a good conversation, a laugh, or a moment of complicity?

And let’s not even talk about performance stereotypes. Men must be tireless “pleasure machines,” while women must be goddesses of sensuality. But, surprise! Men also like to cuddle after the act, and women can absolutely take the initiative without shocking anyone. Sexual desire is like a dance; everyone leads in turn, and sometimes we step on each other’s toes, but the most important thing is to have fun.

And what if we all came from Earth?!?!?!

As a sexologist, what I try to remind my clients is that stereotypes are made to be challenged. Sexual desire is unique to each individual, regardless of gender. We are all complex beings with our own desires, needs, and fantasies. So, instead of confining ourselves to boxes, let’s open up to the diversity of experiences and pleasures.

Next time you hear a gender stereotype about sexual desire, remember that Mars and Venus would laugh at us. And between us, a good laugh is also an excellent aphrodisiac.